Great. So now the whole world thinks it's my problem. I simply don't know why some people can't keep their mouths shut. Is it so hard to try not to say something? Helping people does not equal to breaking promises. Trying to help doesn't mean you can "rephrase something" but still having the meaning inside. Moreover, it doesn't mean to set conclusions and thinking someone must have been wrong after only hearing one comment. An advice to everyone: Don't think I person can keep a promise even when they "promised". Of course, many of them can, but maybe there are just a few around you that can't. Especially the ones closest to you...And the point that they don't trust you at all is another thing.

To whom it may concern:
If I ever did anything that directly or indirectly hurt/annoyed/angered/caused any convenience anyone, I apologize for that. But honestly, I really don't know what I've done that irritated anyone. From what I've observed lately, your actions have made me felt sure that I have, although I really don't know what that is. If you think you want me to correct what I've done, tell me, ok? If you choose not to tell me and you rather prefer us to stay like this forever, well.. fine with me. I respect you with every decision. Once again, sorry if I unintentionally gave trouble to anyone...

Trying to write the "script" for assembly. Topic: faith. Arghh...Why am I always stuck with this topic? Well, I don't know...One thing that I lack right now. No faith in whatsoever I'm doing... dim suen. A really ironic topic. I can't think of anything to write and it's already 10:14. Not gonna sleep.. aii..
Not much happened today. Needlework and fencing afterschool....
No mood to write.. still got a bunch of work on my hands..

You: I know I promised you I'll stand up again and keep going, not to worry about it much, but...it's too hard to "not to worry". When you have to face the problem everyday, it's not that easy. Don't want to stand up now, that fall really hurt. But I must... I know I must...

I'm getting so tired now. Dealing with everything. Studying, piano (yes, it's becoming a pain now), and of course... totalachealseaism. I have been through this before, and I don't want to repeat it again. No thankyou, I've had enough stomachaches and headaches and worries before and going through this again is going to be double painful. This is just the repetition of what happened a year ago. I thought it would be over when she's gone. But it didn't go. It repeated again. And this time... it came up in double. Maybe not... maybe even more. I don't want to conclude it too early, but it seems so true. And I really don't want to believe. Give me any evidence to show me I'm wrong... anything at all.....
It happened all too sudden. Too.. shocked. Just not accustomed to all these sudden changes. Or should I say, I will never be accustomed. But especially at times like these...

Everyone's browsing now cause the computer is having some problems, the teacher one. Oh... CHi. HIst lessons now. horrr

Had an *interesting* RK lesson for the start of the day. * with dead people... haaa...Survived the 3 lessons of needlework.
"Have to try it out and communicate with it first, or it'll be very naughty"...eh-hum... by the way, the "it" is the sewing machine...And another highlight for today... history again.

"Why are you all laughing? Is it because of my watch?" ehhhh....yau wui lor
Actually it was because most of us were having "dictation" on her words. We were laughing at our actions of getting out notebooks, not at her watch...
There's more...
"Some of them study in bok-bok-tsai" ( broke into a series of giggles because we didn't how to copy it)

"egg-sperts" (experts)

"try to 'create' some cantonese songs"

"so-so aspects" (social aspects)

Lots more... but... cannot type them all out.. heee

Started off with a very *interesting* assembly, Jen and Winnie....haa..
Just the usual stuff really. Had jmc afterwards, "sight-readed" Three Russian folksongs. hee.. you know our sight-reading is soo good. We got them correct first time. S2 really loud... heheheh. And poy was playing too slow (don't kill me!)it wasn't fun having the song too slow!
Nothing much... haven't got the mood to write.
Gor: Thanks for your email ar! I agree, girls seem to be a little more emotional. A problem with the genes or something? =P But don't worry, I'll remember your words, although I cannot promise I won't be grey gar..=)

每次寂寞 家中某角
重頭再看你欣賞的好一本著作
後記中寫秋心是愁
這篇小說彷悲曲獨奏
想起你我在秋季的街角分手
片片葉落 街中轉角
原來季節已轉換冰冷的感覺
問情義多久 叫做曾擁有
仍未看得透 你不親口解釋為可走
愁 如紅葉落索的時候
悲傷在停留
一堆堆思念仍未夠
過後仍是愁

究竟"樂觀"的定義是什麼呢? 能夠把每一樣事都看得輕鬆, 愉快? 還是無論事情怎壞也要知道它"好"的一方面? 真的很佩服樂觀的人. 對我來說, 要樂觀很難. 明明是悲哀的一件事, 哪有好的一方面呢? 也許這就是每個人都能夠不同的原因之一. 你對我說"看開一點"這種句子不會有用, 因為我就是不能. 執著的我, 很想樂觀. 但接踵而來的挑戰, 實在太難.
Still bugged with the totalachelseasim. It's going away slower than I thought it would. In fact, it's not getting away, it's staying here and starting to take root. Maybe because it's Sunday today, the thought of it isn't really big, but then... a day later, it will come back up again. I don't know how much longer I can survive with this...it's eating really hard...